Monday, December 27, 2010
How was your Christmas?
We had most of the day to ourselves, and then we spent the rest of the day with family.
My sister-in-law came early and helped me cook dinner. It was really helpful to have another person in the kitchen.
We got the funniest gift from my my husband's parents.
We got a SodaStream Genesis Soda Maker! lol
At first I thought it was a pretty weird gift, but the more I thought about it, it's pretty cool!
We can actually make our own pop and sparkling water, with no high fructose corn syrup or aspartame!
We have been trying to make more of our own food and things around the house, so it actually fits us very well; just had to get over the initial reaction! HA
I am going to try out all of the flavors soon and see if they really taste the same. I'll let you know.
I am pretty excited about it!!!
Today we all weren't feeling very well, but we are starting to feel better, so tomorrow, I bet we will be much better.
The kids had a blast opening their presents, and were so grateful for everything they got.
You know, it seems as if each time we get together for the holidays, we get into some kind of biblical disagreement.
You know it is bad when you want to ban talking about scripture.
You should definitely want to talk about Jesus and the Bible, but not when it causes an argument.
Thanksgiving was ruined because of this, and there was talk that was upsetting yesterday too.
All in all though it was still nice to visit with family and celebrate Jesus, although I would like to make it even more about Him in the coming years.
On my dads side of the family, I don't even know what to say.
My dad died about 10 years ago, and after that my step mom and her kids all distanced themselves from us, and I don't know why.
She always told us that we were just like her kids, and that she could never not have us in her life.
She even promised my dad as he was dying, that we would always stay a family, but apparently, she doesn't want to.
It is so hurtful, but I try to think that it must be for the best.
And to top it all off, my aunt now doesn't want me, or my brother or sister, at their holidays. She doesn't come out and say it, but she has her brother and his wife, and all of their kids over, and we are the only ones not invited,(my dad's kids)
She tells me their house is too small, but we have had dozens more people there for the holidays before.
She said she can't cook that much. Me and my sister offered to do the cooking, more excuses.
She said she just didn't want to mess with it. So hurtful.
Yet, everyone else can come over, please. My dad would be so disappointed with her and my step mom, and how things have turned out.
I don't even know what to say anymore.
I never thought my aunt would do this. I know my nanny (grandma) doesn't want it that way, but my aunt controls things.
You probably don't know much about my mom, or that side of my family.
But my mom and I have always had problems. I don't want to get into too many details, but she has always been very hurtful, and my grandma, yes my grandma, has spread so many lies about me and my family that it is just despicable.
I don't know why she does that, but the only thing I can think of is that I am different from them. I don't get involved in their issues, and I am kind of the scapegoat of the family. It is easier to lay the blame for everything everyone else does on me, than to lay it on them, since they all spend so much time together.
It has been very tough, because I don't feel like I have much family, and my in-laws have been more family to me than my own.
I want a good relationship with them all, but I have learned that I can't change them, so until things are changed, I can't be that involved.
Now, my mom and her sister have been calling lately, and have been being very nice. Something is up! HA HA HA
Seriously though, I have heard from them both 2 or 3 times in the last few months, and I never hear from them, so I think they are trying to make things better with family members.
I will say that my aunt has always been here for me, through everything, so we have not had any problems, but I just don't usually hear from her that often either.
My sister said that they read these books about helping with relationships, so I think that is where this is coming from.
I'll take it though! HEE HEE I just really hope that things can be different with me and my mom. I can't keep going back to the same old stuff. I can't let my kids get hurt the way I did.
SO, I pray that things can be good. I want them to know her.
My son met her for the first time a few months ago, back when my niece got hurt from her horse, and when she told him she was his grandma, he said, "Your not MY grandma!"
Oh, I was hoping he didn't hurt her feelings, but he really thought we were tricking him.
He said, "I already have a grandma."
Anyhow, he didn't believe us, and I think he does now, after more talking, but weirdly, I think it has grown them a weird, special relationship. HA HA
He calls her his "not grandma" and she calls him her "not grandson"
I know, it is weird, but they think it is funny!
It would be amazing to have a relationship with my mother. I have NEVER had one, and you ALWAYS want one, no matter what has been done.
You know, the way I was raised has made it so hard on me in raising my own family, but I am not going to use that as an excuse to fail. It has made me stronger, and honestly, if my husband and I hadn't went through what we did as kids, we probably wouldn't be homeschooling and raising our kids the way we are now.
I am thankful, in a weird sort of way, for the troubles.
It has made us see what we need to do for our kids.
So, I am very grateful for everything this season, good and bad, because it all brings good fruit in the end.
Thank you to all of my friends who help and support me in all that I do.
And, I am so grateful for my husband. He is truly the best man I know.
He loves me more than I can imagine, and sometimes I don't even know why.
He is a great dad, and very protective and supportive.
Well, I hope you all had a great Christmas, and I will soon be writing of all the things I would like to do this year, so I will talk to you soon!
Love You all!
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